Search

Create Space

Creating, living, learning.

Tag

Friends

Bullying & Beyond…You can make a difference

20180708_110930
Time and the right conditions not only preserve but bring about something of beauty – Marie Clancy.

 

The following “Tips for a better internet together” offers some very practical advice which I’d encourage parents and guardians to discuss with their children.  These simple tips could make a big difference to someone who is experiencing bullying.

“1. Reach out to someone you know is being bullied.  A simple message of support, a like, or a smile can be enough to give hope to someone who feels alone.

2. Include someone you see being isolated.  Invite them to sit with you at lunch, include them in a chat, share jokes with them.

3.  Make a clear statement that you think bullying is unacceptable and not just another part of growing up.  Sharing or liking anti-bullying messages on social networks is a simple way of doing this.  You might even go further and create your own.

4.  Say ‘No’ or ‘Stop’ when you see someone behaving unfairly.  Standing up takes real courage but not doing it is the same as giving your permission for someone to be bullied.

5.  Get help from an adult if you think that standing up to a bully might put you at risk of being hurt or becoming the next target.  You might not always be able to fix things without putting yourself at risk, but you can always do the right thing – and that means getting help.  In fact telling a parent or teacher is usually the moment when the situation stops getting worse and starts being dealt with.

6. Report it.  All good schools and clubs have ways for you to report bullying incidents.  Find out what they are and use them.  You can also click the report abuse button on websites like Facebook and Twitter.  They all have to take reports seriously and remember they won’t reveal the identity of the person making the report.

7.  Don’t bully back no matter how angry you feel.  You should never accept bullying but don’t cross the line and bully the bully.  It’s ok to point out that the bullying should stop but it’s not ok to send abusive messages in retaliation.  It makes it more difficult to get help from your school.  They might even end up punishing you too.”

Source: http://www.webwise.ie

MySelfie and the wider world

Webwise Primary Anti-Cyber Bullying Teachers’ Handbook

What advice do you give your children if they see someone being bullied?

Le grà,

Mindfully Marie xx

 

Bullying & Beyond…Acceptance & Resistance

20180708_110930
Time and the right conditions not only preserve but bring about something of beauty – Marie Clancy.

 

The turning point came, the day I learned to accept our son John’s inability to attend school or to live a functioning life.  His life had become dysfunctional because of school bullying.  I shared some of the backstory in Bullying & Beyond… Painting the pain, part three.

Learning to accept his dysfunction as a result of bullying, was a slow process but it was the catalyst for change which allowed him to break free of his dysfunction and move forward with his life.  I shared that in Bullying & Beyond… “Acceptance”, Love & Time.

Our daughter Emma also suffered at the hands of bullies and sadly we are, to this day, still dealing with the aftermath.

It has been a struggle to stay strong and be resilient.  It was often one step forward and two steps back.

But yesterday I remembered the power of acceptance and I let go resistance.  I see yesterday as two steps forward and one step back and that is progress, it is a sign of change to come…

Let me try to explain…

We attempted to drive to Newbridge to visit Newbridge Silverware’s Doris Day exhibition.  You might like to learn about this wonderful event here… https://visitnewbridgesilverware.com/doris-day

We got half way there when Emma could no longer contain her anxiety.

Yesterday was our second attempt, the first attempt we achieved about a third of the journey so yesterday there was progress.

But the biggest progress for me was remembering my ‘acceptance‘ of John’s dysfunction, thanks to the reminder of my Psychologist to let go ‘resistance,’

I was able to make peace with this event and love Emma for herself.  She did her best. We did our best. We sat in our car, in a service station, having a coffee while Emma took a short walk and some air.  We made peace with the situation.  We were truly grateful and expressed our gratitude for that time, that moment, having coffee, having family time, living life to the best we can.

We turned for home with no regrets or upset or shattered expectations but with happy hearts and later last night, Emma announced that she wants to try again next Saturday!

This exhibition means a lot to Emma.  She adores Doris Day and that entire era.  She is training her dog, named ‘Doris’ after Doris Day, to be the first recognised Psychiatric Assistance Dog in Ireland.  She is pushing politicians to recognise this existing EU law, in Ireland.  It is a slow process. I would love you to give her some support as she shares her IG account at dorismakesmyday.

I shared some of Emma & Doris’ backstory in Petition please support…Bullying & Beyond… Painting the Pain, Part II

If you are relatively new here, thank you for reading.  Thank you to my regular readers for your comforting presence as we journey and learn life lessons together.  Your company makes all the difference.

Le grà,

Mindfully Marie xx

Walking into 2020…

No matter where you are in the world, remember as you walk forward into 2020 you have your friend at your side and I’m here for you waiting in the shadow…

Le grà,

Mindfully Marie xx

20191216_131052

Present…the best present…

20191211_234236
Emma was fully present, lost in flow as she created this gingerbread house, a replica of our home and I just love it!

 

Present

P… for present, being present, living in this very awesome moment with the conviction that any struggle lived in the moment before, is now dead and gone and any pain in the moment ahead, is but an illusion…
R…for reality, creating your unique reality, living your dream, accepting nothing less, appreciating the dreams of others even if they could never be your dream
E…for evolving, changing, growing, mindful that to remain static is not an option
S…for senses, trusting your senses, feeding them with experiences not possessions, not needing to be anything or anyone but yourself
E…for encouraging others, seeing the best in them, challenging them to see their own capabilities
N…for nature and nurture, learning from nature, changing like it changes with the seasons, nurturing your soul and noticing your creativity and spirit evolve as a result
T…for taking time to practice gratitude, thankful for significant others, thankful for coming to know yourself, thankful for being fully and amazingly present… the best present.

I hope you receive the best present this year.

Le grà,

Mindfully Marie xx

 

Radiate because?

  1. via Daily Prompt: Radiate

I radiate because of you… my husband, my child, my friend, my fellow blogger…

I radiate because writing has opened up pockets of opportunity for self-expression, possibility and growth…

I radiate because today I can be the smile that makes somebody’s day…

I radiate because today I can be the kind words that take your worries away…

I radiate because tomorrow it might be too late to radiate…

I radiate…

20160420_085554

…because I can share hugs that replaces words and tell you that you radiate the world to me!

Think about it…

You radiate because…?

Le grà,

Mindfully Marie xx

 

 

 

 

Highest achievers?

 

The results of Ireland’s Leaving Certificate State Exam were released on the 13th of August.

This exam is the culmination of five years of study and it holds the key to the future of many students.

For months before the exams, which are held each year in June, two things happen.

1.  Some students don’t cast the upcoming exams a thought.

2.  Some students stress themselves to the point of mental and physical distress over sitting these exams.

For weeks before the results are released in August, two things happen.

1.    Some students don’t cast the upcoming  results a thought.

2.  Some students stress themselves out worrying about the outcome or points they will achieve.

And that is the story of life.

The students at 1. above, takes things in their stride, they do not struggle with their emotions or become anxious.

The students at 2. above, are predisposed to an anxious nature.  They struggle to handle their emotions and cope with stress.

And that is the human story or condition.  We are all different, in how we see the world and how we cope in the world.

The Leaving Certificate acknowledges the high achievers and rightly so!  It tabulates the results and rewards students accordingly.  It is a grading system.  It however, fails to grade students on how they function and cope emotionally or psychologically.

So please consider a few important things.

1.  Look past the A4 sheet of Academic Outcomes and see that each student, teenager, boy, girl, non-gender, behind the A4 grading system is individual, unique, different and consider how they truly feel. They may not be the highest achiever in maths or biology but they might be the highest achiever in resilience or mental health management.

2.  Don’t compare them to others.  It doesn’t matter what their friends or peers got.  Don’t expect them to get the same results. Do expect them to react or cope in very different ways and be there for them, if their world falls apart.  Be calm, be capable and let them see that by supporting each other this will all work out!

3.  If you are a teacher or parent and your student, son or daughter haven’t reached the exam stage yet, then make the most of it!  Tell them, right the way through school, how unique and different they are.  Watch out for and acknowledge their high achievements, whether it is academic or simply turning in for school.  Remind them that they have numerous talents, some of which will be uncovered academically and many, many more which will only surface when they study at the college of life!

Le grà,

Mindfully Marie xx

 

 

 

Doris & Emma’s Journey…

IMG-e320d1539b4f1e7da86d1b4bac7deb7c-V
Doris will be an “extraspectacular” Psychiatric Assistance Dog

 

This is Doris!

and she’s in the kitchen

Together with Emma

They are cooking up a symphony

That will paint Ireland pinky red

Or better still Magenta

As they succeed in bringing

Psychiatric Assistance Dogs to Ireland!

Together they have lobbied politicians and the

Minister for Disability Issues

Finian McGrath

To compile a proposal to Government

Granting public access rights

To Psychiatric Assistance Dogs

So that people, like Emma, who live

With mental health conditions

Can bring a trained Psychiatric Assistant Dog

With them to public places

Just as users of Guide Dogs for the blind

Or Autism Support Dogs have benefitted

From their canine companions

And Doris will be an “extraspectacular” Psychiatric Assistance Dog

Being the first of her kind in Ireland!

https://lightmotifs.wordpress.com/2019/08/12/three-things-challenge-pl149/

And…

Did you know that…

Magenta Ain’t A Colour

By Liz Elliott

Magenta is an “extraspectral” color.

Sir Isaac Newton noticed that magenta did not exist in the spectrum of colors from white light when he played with prisms.

But when he superimposed the red end of the spectrum on to the blue end, he saw the color magenta (this can be done with two prisms to make two spectral spreads, “rainbows”):

Magenta is the only color that does not exist as a single wavelength of light

For more interesting facts and optical illusions  check out…

http://www.biotele.com/magenta.html

Le grà,

Mindfully Marie xx

Unusual…

20180325_224420
Hooch, our rescue greyhound, looking a little unusual!

 

Calmkate, aroused Fun Friday… Unusual

 

Friday Fun – unusual

Le grà,

Mindfully Marie xx

 

 

Bullying & Beyond…Perpetuating Social Norms…

20180708_110930
Time and the right conditions not only preserve but bring about something of beauty – Marie Clancy.

 

Today I would like to share T.S’s very emotive, true story from his blog “Crazywriterof6.” As I read T.S’s distressing reality, I felt my body became anxious.  I felt his apprehension and fear.  His sense of loneliness and isolation is palpable.  He says… “Maybe some of you can relate and see that even then, you weren’t alone”. No child should be in dread every day, isolated and living with the fear of bullying!

In my last post I wrote about the difficulty I had in supporting my children, both victims of bullying, because of the pressure on victims to remain silent.  You might like to read it… Big Boys…Don’t Cry!

We now hear in T.S’s own words, his deeply ingrained and debilitating belief as to why he was bullied… “The torture continued. Many moments before this event, many after. I have written some of them out, just to get them out. All this because I was different than the “normal people”, different from what society says I should be. Different because I was overweight”.  I believe he was not different… everybody is different and everybody has the right to be respected for who and how they are.

Please enhance your understanding by reading his story…

https://wordpress.com/read/blogs/48424428/posts/20

At a funeral yesterday, one sentence struck me, that sentence was “We could all be better people,” meaning we could all do more to be there for others.

Let’s break down the silence and begin a cross cultural, worldwide conversation about bullying.  Let’s educate ourselves and our children about bullying and let’s tear down out-dated social norms.

Le grà,

Mindfully Marie xx

 

 

 

 

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑