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Bullying & Beyond…24. Beware the word ‘Rare’?

Time and the right conditions not only preserve but bring about something of beauty – Marie Clancy.

 

“It is rare that children with good confidence and self esteem will be the victim of bullying”…so a recent article stated,

Rare…means seldom occurring.

I say beware the word ‘rare‘ which can lull you into a false sense of security…

Rare still happens to someone!

Have you ever stopped to consider how rare is rare?

Consider this… If your children were functioning to the peak of their individual ability at home, in school, and in community life until they were bullied, over an extended period of time, would that tip them into the ‘rare‘ category?

Or would reporting the bullying but being told ‘stand up for yourself,’ ‘build a wall and put it behind you’ or “he needs to be more resilient” be the tipping point into that “rare” category?

Having good confidence and self esteem might make you more effective at dealing with bullying, but if bullying is experienced on an on-going basis, and if it is left unsupported over a long period, it is the DURATION of bullying that, in my experience, overwhelms the victim’s confidence and self esteem and determines the impact of bullying, both short and long term.

The only solution to bullying, is rapid and easy access to support and that support must be informed, professional and cohesive. Anything less is unacceptable! You might find some information & support in this post…Bullying & Beyond…20 Knowledge is Power!

What do you think? Please join in this conversation and help others find the support they need, now, and not when it is too late.

Le grà,

Mindfully Marie xx

 

An Irish wave… topped off with a hug!

An irish Wave
Beautiful County Waterford coastline!

 

You can’t beat the sight or sound of a wave, or many waves to wash over you and sooth your spirit.   A friendly wave from across the street or from a friend as they drive past also lifts my spirit.  Top it off with a hug and you’re onto a winner.

Do waves and hugs improve your day?

Le grà,

Mindfully Marie.

Inspired by Calmkate’s Friday Fun – Waves @ aroused blog

https://wordpress.com/read/blogs/96548416/posts/8403

 

Bullying & Beyond…24. Mindful Heart!

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Time and the right conditions not only preserve but bring about something of beauty – Marie Clancy.

 

In my previous post…Bullying & Beyond…23.Who cares?
I shared some of my guesses as to why victims of bullying hide how much they care.

Mich at Michnavs joined the conversation and her insightful comment got me thinking, so I’m breaking with my tradition of waiting to post at the weekend.

This is what Mich said… “Very well said Marie. I am fortunate to have been a teacher and a mother as well..having said that, I got to witness different behaviors and coping mechanisms of kids from different ages…and it’s not easy to spot a problematic or bullied kid…because sometimes they are really good at keeping it cool…but nevertheless I have kept a very mindful heart..”

This was my reply to Mich..

Thank you Mich, I appreciate your encouraging feedback. Thank you also for sharing your thoughts and experience. Bullies are very cunning, manipulative and powerful in their control over their victims, so you are correct in saying it’s not easy to spot a bullied child. Victims have many reasons, (as we’ve seen in my previous post), to become masters of disguise, making it very difficult for teachers of large classes and with ever increasing workloads, to detect a child who is struggling with bullying.

I really like your term a “mindful heart,” it is a good marriage of heart & mind and I envisage it being very Rogerian, (Carl Rogers), encompasing UPR (unconditional positive regard), empathy (being able to step into the victim’s shoes) and congruence (being your true, genuine & real self), all positive, powerful and necessary attributes for teachers, and the core conditions, enabling teachers create effective and theraputic relationships in their classrooms.

These core conditions are the foundation of every successful relationship be it in school, at home or in society.

https://trueselfcounseling.com/2016/02/20/3-core-conditions-for-therapeutic-change/

As a parent, teacher or victim of bullying, what do you think?

Le grà,

Mindfully Marie xx

Good Morning Ireland…and welcome!

Screenshot_20190522-084339_Samsung Internet

Good morning Ireland!

Whether it’s one view or one hundred, your company is always welcome…

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter.”

https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/izaak_walton_147131?src=t_good_company

I wish you a day filled with good company; your own, and that of others!

Le grà,

Mindfully Marie xx

Monday’s Memory Lane…

Welcome to Monday’s memory lane where I share an old post…

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In this post I tried to describe anxiety through the five senses… ABSTRACT ANXIETY

If you could see, hear, taste, smell and touch anxiety how would you describe it?

Le grá,

Mindfully Marie xx

Hello from Ireland!

Hello Norway,

Welcome on board! And thank you…

Screenshot_20190222-132222
Welcome to Create Space http://www.ree-creates.com

 

Actually, I’d like to take a minute or two to thank everybody!

I won’t start naming Countries or individual names because you know I mean you, and all because you stopped in to visit and share such kind and encouraging words this past week, since Andy joined our family.

The thing is you will never know how much of a difference your words have made to both myself and Emma!

And of course to Andy…as you can see he’s under so much pressure!

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I don’t know what we’d do without those frequent “dog-naps!”

 

Emma has just started an Instagram account and she would love you to visit her and Andy @reallyhandyandy where she will document and share their journey towards improved mental health and where she hopes to fulfill her dream and goal of paving the way towards the availability of Psychiatric Service Dogs in Ireland.

This post explains in more detail… Bullying & Beyond… 10.Painting the Pain, part two.

Do you have a dog or other amazing pet? What difference does your pet make to your life? Have you heard of Psychiatric Service Dogs?

With heartfelt wishes,

Le grà,

Mindfully Marie xx

Let’s call it…

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This is Andy, new to our home since yesterday. Isn’t he so beautiful! He’s trying to find his feet and he’s so full of love…just like all of us!

 

It’s one of those days…

I’m normally quite risk adverse but it’s one of those days…

Where I’m just going to call it… on the subject of ‘likes‘ and ‘follows‘…

If you just ‘follow’ my blog, I’m not going to follow you back.  I’m not interested in numbers…

And let’s just call it again…

If you ‘like’ one post from my blog, and it’s a post I re-blogged, because I liked it enough to want to share it some more; and then you ‘follow’ me, I’m still not going to ‘follow’ you back because although I’m glad you liked my re-blog, you still don’t know anything about me and I’m not interested in building numbers, I’m interested in building connections with real people, so please…

Read at least one of my posts, you don’t even have to ‘like’ it, if you don’t think it warrants a ‘like’ but talk to me… so I can talk to you,

I’m Irish… I love people and good conversation. Tell me what you think of my post.  Maybe, even though I know you are busy, read two posts of mine and leave me some feedback. Tell me what struck you about my post, first anything positive and then a little, gentle constructive feedback; so I can try to improve how I build my words and how I build a community that really cares.

Thank you for reading.  What’s your opinion on ‘follows’ and ‘likes?’

Le grà,

Marie xx

 

Riddle…

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Enlighten yourself, it lights the way!

Life is one long riddle…or need it be?

R   Ruminating, if it’s the negative sort, will hold you back,

I   Initiative & Imagination propels you forward,

D  Doubting yourself merely

D  Damages your Initiative & Imagination

L  Love yourself,  as you are,

E  Enlightenment follows and solves your puzzle!

Much love,

Marie xx

wordofthedaychallenge.wordpress.com/2019/01/06/riddle/

 

 

A time for “Joy!”

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My Angel of joy!

 

Christmas has been family orientated, restful and restorative.  Today I want to wish you a very happy New Year and share my word for the new year ahead.

The word I want to focus on is JOY.  I want to continue what was my new focus on GRATITUDE over the last twelve months and develop it into GRATITUDE that highlights the JOY in my life!

I want to find JOY in the ordinary.  I want to find joy when I wake up every morning to help me shift the NAT (negative automatic thought) that always tells me I’m exhausted despite what should have been adequate sleep.  I want to find JOY at every opportunity, no matter how my body feels and I want to do my best to bring that feeling of JOY into the lives of those around me!

Here is some of the JOY that I found already today…

A lie on in bed, reading blogs, reading and replying to amazing comments, a lazy breakfast with no eye on the time and surrounded by family, an unexpected hug of appreciation and writing this post to share with you!

What brought JOY into your day? How did you share it with others?

What is your word for the new year?

Much love,

Marie xx

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