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Hi... failte (Irish for welcome! and pronounced fall-thhha). I'm a newbie to blogging, here just over a year, but what a great year it has been! I've turned the corner to 50 recently and two things become more relevant...time and experiences! Material possessions are less important! Using time wisely and truly experiencing each day holds a new significance for me! If you wish..., a little of the back story... I''m blessed to be married to a kind and loving man for 28 years, we have two children now 19 and 21. As I approached 40 and searching for something more, whilst holding down my then part-time legal secretarial work, I trained as a voluntary adult literacy tutor, with the hope of helping adults improve their literacy skills and have a second, and better experience of learning! However, little did I think that wanting to help others improve their lives would see my own life improve beyond measure also! You see for years I found it difficult to know what to do as I watched our two children suffer at the hands of bullies. Their struggle began to change when I returned to education! Through education I slowly gained valuable knowledge, I grew in confidence and self-esteme and it had a ripple effect! By 2014, aged 47 I had completed a Higher Certificate in Literacy Development and a B.A. in Adult Education. I love my work as an adult educator, particularly when adults trust me enough to let down their defences and 'let me in'. Then I can help them by getting to know what makes them 'tic' and what 'lights their fire!'. As an added bonus along the way I've realised that I also have a love of writing and that writing is cathartic (providing psychological relief through written expression of built up emotions), both for my students and myself. This blog enables me to pursue that new-found interest and I've really enjoying reading your blogs, sharing comments, getting to know so many people and gaining new perspectives. I also like to share any little 'gems' of learning I've gathered along the way! Thanks for sharing your stories and for helping me realise that it is all possible...and that together we write a truly better story! Much love, Marie x

Avid readers, this might interest you…April 2019 Quarterly Author Newsletter — This Is My Truth Now

Today’s post is a copy of my quarterly author newsletter for April 2019. I’ve been issuing these newsletters for just over a year, and I’m excited to share them on my blog. To read the current quarterly newsletter, you can sign up via my author website via this link. I’ve included a link to this […]

April 2019 Quarterly Author Newsletter — This Is My Truth Now

Bullying & Beyond… 19.And from the tunnel… two emerge


Emerge… to rise or appear from a hidden or unknown place or condition, to come out into view


It just occurred to me this morning, that both our adult children are up bright and early heading on their own individual, unique adventures.

Both of them have been embracing life to the fullest of their individual ability, facing up to life’s challenges, enhancing their potential, writing their story and creating dreams to cherish.

You might ask what’s unusual about two adult children getting on with life?

Well, simply because they are examples of what resilience looks like.

They have travelled the long and ugly road of bullying and learned well from its scars. They have swam and often sank in its muddy waters but both have refused to be broken. They have both instead re-crafted themselves into emerging and evolving version of themselves.

And I am a mother, like any mother, who is both proud of them and equally trusts in their own ability to be proud of themselves.

The mistake we made, which I’d like to share with other parents is…

We taught our children to have respect for others but we forgot to teach them; actually we couldn’t teach them the importance of self-respect, because we didn’t know ourselves how important it was. We have painfully learned, that self-respect is vital and the only way to get it is to respect yourself enough to

EXPECT RESPECT FROM OTHERS and take NOTHING LESS!

I wish you and yours, similar life learning and life embracing adventures.

Have you or your family experienced bullying? Have you learned the importance of self-respect?

Le grà,

Mindfully Marie Xx

Know Your Mission: Finding Purpose in Your Life & Work as a Teacher.. — Tea4Teacher

Staying in touch with the reasons you became a teacher is one of the best ways to ensure you don’t get jaded and lose your enthusiasm in the rigmarole and bureaucracy of teaching life. Over time, people tend to see more obstacles and allow the politics to rob them of the joy of the job. […]

Know Your Mission: Finding Purpose in Your Life & Work as a Teacher.. — Tea4Teacher

A timely share by Anna J, as we approach the final term and our batteries start to lag…good reminders for teachers but also anyone involved in parenting!

For you today…

Just trust…

your heart and soul,

to lead you

to the places that

your eye and mind,

The work of the wonderful Katie O’R. A name that will resonate with many in time to come.

can’t even begin to see or perceive!

Le grà,

Marie xx

For you today… from me!

Watch out for the work of the budding & wonderful Katie O’R in the not too distant future.

Just trust…

your heart & soul,

to take you

to the most exhilarating places

your mind & eyes

can’t even begin to see…

Le grà,

Marie xx

As we age…

Follow this link to find philip Abang…

https://wordpress.com/read/feeds/79211814/posts/2243713398

Today, I am at a loss to find the right words, and that’s a first for me, being Irish! Philip Abang asked if he could share my post ‘Scatter’ A simple reblog would have filled me with happiness but to find he had applied his creative talent to my words and produce something so colourful and beautiful fills me with pride and joy! But to follow that up with such an affirming and encouraging write-up/testimonial is a whole new experience for me! Take a tour of Philip’s blog, you won’t be disappointed! Le grà, Marie

https://wordpress.com/read/feeds/79211814/posts/2243713398

 

Philip Abang

As we age...

As we age, we change... Photography. Philip Abang. Create Space

I was reading the post Monday’s Memory Lane… 3.Scatter the previous week and was drawn to these inspiring words;

“As we age, we change how we think, how we feel and how we behave. We drop old habits and seek out new. Enjoy scattering your thoughts…some go unseen and blow away on the breeze but some nourish the ground they fall on.” _Marie

Marie wrote these inspiring words on her website Create Space. I thought it was great and insightful about life, so I decided to place her quote on a photo I had taken above to convey a kind of meaning.

Marie is an amazing writer and has an exceptional skill in interpreting life, art, design, almost anything. I am a huge admirer of her works. I highly recommend visiting her website and follow her works. She is incredible.

Design, Art direction, Post
By Philip Abang

View original post

Bullying & Beyond… 18.Sauce, Diamond, Lynx.

20180708_110930
Time and the right conditions not only preserve but bring about something of beauty – Marie Clancy.

 

My writing has brought me through the best of times and the worst of times to a Spring of hope from a Winter of despair to paraphrase Charles Dickens’ “A Tale of two Cities.”

I’m breaking with my usual routine of sharing at the end of the week because, lets call a spade a spade, I have been let go again, unpaid, like every year, for 11 years now, for every holiday, from my teaching post until after the Easter holidays and so I get to spend time with my much loved and enjoyed family and writing instead of being with my much loved and enjoyed students, whose willingness to share their true selves with me… has brought me through the best of times and the worst of times to a Spring of hope from a Winter of despair!

And thanks to Paulas Light and her 3TC prompts for helping me to voice this…

https://wordpress.com/read/feeds/74951/posts/2244712447

NAMELESS…

She might have thought
She got the sauce
When she retired
To a lush and early pension pot,

That Principal
With no principles or thought for
The children in her care,

Those innocent children, each a
Diamond, she was entrusted to polish
To bring them from the rough
To their most lustrous, luminous shine
She denied,

And so she left him,
unaided,
when he bravely told her
He was being bullied
Him, she left in no doubt,
That he was nothing;
NOTHING in her eyes
Far from a diamond,
Thanks to her cowardice…

“Sometimes you have to stand up for yourself”
As she said
Her damage, that depleated
The diamond of his right
To glow and shine,

Or brought his sister to the front of class

And belittled her grasp of maths

Until her peers laughed

Because of what as a

Principal and Teacher she had lost or

Worse still maybe never had..

But fear not
All is not lost,
Those diamonds
Once voiceless and violated
Have, thanks to the power of

LOVE

AND

LIGHT,

Found their inner sight and

Right to luminosity!

And fear not Mrs Principal
with no principles
Or thought for the children entrusted and dependant on your care,
For Face you will, the

Lynx that latently lies,
Lurking
Within
And your
Lush pension pot and early retirement
Will like the diamonds you failed to polish,
Quickly lose their shine and
Your demise will be one of unrelenting

SHAME…

You took our childrens childhood happiness by trampling on their cries for help,
whether it was the bullying you ignored or the bullying you perpetrated yourself
or the mental health implications,

You were implicit in creating or ignoring,

You crept inside our home
And you depleted
Our childrens childhood happiness
And bullied us, we now know, through their distress and left us unrequited…

But one day I know you’ll read this and you’ll realise, without a doubt, exactly who

You are

and what you’re made of,

And you’ll answer for it…

Have you been failed by the education system? Have you been bullied?  Just know that I have your corner, I hear you and you are a true and beautiful Diamond and you are not alone!

Le grà,

Mindfully Marie xx

 

Bullying & Beyond…17. Stand up, speak up!

20180708_110930
Time and the right conditions not only preserve but bring about something of beauty – Marie Clancy.

 

 

Your child is or has been bullied at school and you have found an opportunity to talk to them, making a written record of events as you discuss them, without being caught up in frustrating and emotionally upsetting arguments. Now pause to acknowledge the progress you have made, you’ve managed to… 6.Avoid the hook!

You’re now aware and can understand that the changes in behaviour you’ve seen are signs of bullying. Those signs probably included your child;

avoiding situations,
reducing their academic performance,
refusing to go to school,
lacking motivation, wanting to achieve goals but showing perfectionist traits, then appearing paralysed,
disappointed by not living up to the high standards they set themselves,
withdrawing into themselves,
being stressed, having emotional outbursts,
showing signs of anxiety, depression, OCD or specific phobias,
consuming excess alcohol, or maybe using drugs,
getting into trouble in school,
being charged with social disorder,
or engaging in self-harm
then…

If you are like me,
you probably struggle to know what to do.

You are unsure of where to turn next.

You are probably paralysed like we were.

You probably struggled to even accept the situation.

You wanted to wave a magic wand and fix everything…

If any of the above resonates with you, it is very important that you are pro-active. Do not allow bullying to render you paralysed. Your child might not want you to speak up for fear of making the situation worse or been seen as ‘a grass’ or a ‘cry-baby’. You must be very discreet but you must seek out support to help you stand up and speak up to bullying!

In my next post I will help you list what you can do.

Have you noticed your child’s behaviour changing? Have you struggled to understand the changes you’ve noticed.  Can you see it from a different perspective now?

Le grà,

Mindfully Marie xx

Bullying & Beyond…5.Loneliness

 

20180708_110930
Time and the right conditions not only preserve but bring about something of beauty – Marie Clancy.

 

In my previous post I wrote about the importance of self-care, you might like to read it 4.Self-care x 10! When you or your children are struggling to cope with bullying it is very important to continue to practice self-care during and after the event.   Being bullied can cause strong feelings of loneliness which come from the isolation of bullying. Bullying thrives on isolation and fear. Lack of access to information, lack of support and worse still lack of knowing which way to turn or who to ask for help all serve to enhance the isolation and loneliness you feel!

The loneliness was something I found hardest to cope with as I struggled to find answers and effective support.

But there is help out there.  Don’t allow yourself to be rendered voiceless.

So I want YOU to know that I am here for YOU and YOU are not alone…reach out, share your concerns and talk about the bullying you or your child are experiencing.

What has been your experience of the loneliness of bullying?  How would you describe the loneliness of bullying?  How did you overcome it?

Much love,

Mindfully Marie xx

 

 

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