
Inverted means to turn (something) upside down
Or to change the position, order, or relationship of things so that they are the opposite of what they had been.
When you live with something challenging like bullying for long enough and see the destructive effect it has on you and your family, you need to realise that you have two choices, namely
1. stay trapped within the challenge, trying to escape, or
2. find the gift within the challenge and grow it!
When all else failed us as parents, and we could find no solution to the destructive effects bullying had on our children, we stopped trying to find the solutions we wanted to find.
We didn’t admit defeat but we accepted that this was where we were, nothing more, nothing less. We took our focus off all that had gone wrong. We shifted our lens to focus on building our resilience. We stepped back, paused and regrouped. Then we hit back with the most powerful weapon of all… love.
We opened ourselves up, to just love. We didn’t hold out expectations. We didn’t compare. We didn’t complain that life was unfair. We refocused instead on every positive we could find. We spoke from a place of positivity and within a short space of time we began to notice change!
And now, a mere 12 months later, our son has completed his first year in college and has spent his summer touring a number of European countries. Our daughter is pushing forward with her campaign to have Psychiatric Service Dogs recognised in Ireland and is in the process of training Ireland’s first every Psychiatric Service Dog, Doris. I’ve experienced, for myself, how cathartic (healing) writing and sharing is, especially when it is done within a safe and creative space, surrounded by a supportive community who identify with my posts and offer positive and affirming feedback. Because of this support I’ve written over thirty posts on the topic of bullying.
I was recently nominated for an award by Terri at Reclaiming Hope. https://reclaiminghope.blog/
However, living with fibromyalgia/CFS means I have to constantly prioritise my time and energy. I don’t commit time to taking part in awards but I am always pleased to be nominated for an award and I am grateful to Terri for her thoughtful introduction which I’d like to share with you…
“Marie from Create Space.
Marie shares her family’s story of bullying, and the devastating effects it has on the mental health of those affected. Although the subject matter has the potential to be weighty and heartbreaking, Marie balances this by sharing how one can rise above the effects of bullying and make a difference in the world.”
So, when you face your next challenge, what will you choose?
Will you choose to…
1. remain devastated, weighed down and heartbroken, or will you turn the challenge you face on its head, inverted and
2. rise above your challenge to make a difference in the world!
The choice is yours!
Thank you to all who continue to follow, read and share their feelings, thoughts and comments on my bullying posts. I would not have reached this point without you!
Le grà,
Mindfully Marie xx
August 3, 2019 at 2:36 am
Great post. It is true that we must always love children and try to be there for them through their hard times.
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August 3, 2019 at 7:47 am
Thanks Isha, I appreciate your feedback! And in order to ‘always love children and try to be there’ which is not an easy job sometimes, we need to ‘Really Listed’ and practice ‘Self-care x 10’ two other posts I’ve written which you might find interesting. Xx
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August 3, 2019 at 4:49 am
Great post with very wise advice Marie … can see why you were nominated for an award 🙂
Congrats to both your son and daughter .. and you and hubby for handling this so well 🙂
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August 3, 2019 at 8:10 am
Kate, as I said “I would not have reached this point without you Kate or without all the other regular readers who like you have become friends and who continue to give me encouraging feedback! This is the healing proccess that can occur when you are part of something so supportive and powerful! We still face many challenges ahead, like all families but we will endeavour to support Emma and her goal to get Psychiatric Service Dogs recognised in Irish Law and because we strive to learn as we go, I can say in the words of Maya Angelou “I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better.” Have a special weekend. Xx
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August 3, 2019 at 8:23 am
hey you too Marie, and hugs to Emma … her determination will get her there 🙂
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August 3, 2019 at 5:37 pm
I have no doubt but that it will and I’ll make sure she sees your message and your belief in her! X
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August 4, 2019 at 12:15 am
she has the guts to campaign for something so worthwhile, it may take a while to move the authorities but she can do it!
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August 4, 2019 at 5:11 am
Yes, it takes guts Kate to admit her vulnerabilities but also to embrace them as just be an aspect of her and push forward for something she believes in. Something she knows will be a wonderful support to her mental wellbeing and wanting to see others benefit from it as well as a result of new legislation and her candocanineire charity. Xx
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August 4, 2019 at 5:58 am
so sweet 🙂
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August 3, 2019 at 4:00 pm
Thank you for sharing!!.. you and your family are filled with love and courage and that alone will defeat any bully!!.. congratulations for the honors, well deserved!!.. 🙂
“Bad things do happen, how I respond to them defines my character and the quality of my life. I can choose to sit in perpetual sadness, immobilized by the gravity of my loss, or I can choose to rise from the pain and treasure the most precious gift I have– life itself. “ Walter Anderson
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August 3, 2019 at 6:43 pm
Hi Dutch, thank you so much!! We realise that together we are strong and I hope others can benefit from our painful lessons!
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August 4, 2019 at 8:13 pm
So happy to hear about your son and daughter. Enjoyed this post and congratulations on being nominated. =)
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August 5, 2019 at 4:03 am
Thanks Brenda, things have a way of working out once we try to understand the issue, seek out solutions and remain optimistic! Xx
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August 5, 2019 at 6:18 pm
Very well said! =)
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August 5, 2019 at 6:36 pm
Thank you!
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August 5, 2019 at 2:11 pm
Wonderful post and powerful story shared too.
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August 5, 2019 at 5:53 pm
Thanks Paul, that’s good to hear!
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August 5, 2019 at 10:38 pm
My pleasure
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August 17, 2019 at 9:03 pm
Lovely post and the award is well deserved.
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August 17, 2019 at 9:09 pm
Thank you Alison, I appreciate that!
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