Hi... failte (Irish for welcome! and pronounced fall-thhha).
I'm a newbie to blogging, here just over a year, but what a great year it has been!
I've turned the corner to 50 recently and two things become more relevant...time and experiences!
Material possessions are less important! Using time wisely and truly experiencing each day holds a new significance for me!
If you wish..., a little of the back story...
I''m blessed to be married to a kind and loving man for 28 years, we have two children now 19 and 21.
As I approached 40 and searching for something more, whilst holding down my then part-time legal secretarial work, I trained as a voluntary adult literacy tutor, with the hope of helping adults improve their literacy skills and have a second, and better experience of learning!
However, little did I think that wanting to help others improve their lives would see my own life improve beyond measure also!
You see for years I found it difficult to know what to do as I watched our two children suffer at the hands of bullies. Their struggle began to change when I returned to education! Through education I slowly gained valuable knowledge, I grew in confidence and self-esteme and it had a ripple effect!
By 2014, aged 47 I had completed a Higher Certificate in Literacy Development and a B.A. in Adult Education. I love my work as an adult educator, particularly when adults trust me enough to let down their defences and 'let me in'. Then I can help them by getting to know what makes them 'tic' and what 'lights their fire!'.
As an added bonus along the way I've realised that I also have a love of writing and that writing is cathartic (providing psychological relief through written expression of built up emotions), both for my students and myself. This blog enables me to pursue that new-found interest and I've really enjoying reading your blogs, sharing comments, getting to know so many people and gaining new perspectives. I also like to share any little 'gems' of learning I've gathered along the way!
Thanks for sharing your stories and for helping me realise that it is all possible...and that together we write a truly better story!
Much love,
Marie x
My own experiences as a child have left a great deal of damage and is consequently a topic close to my heart. It must be tackled. Thank you for this post Marie. Dx
Darren, I’m sorry you had to go through difficult experiences but I’m glad it helps you understand what I shared. I hope to open up convetsations about it and maybe show others that something negative can become something positive and life changing! Thank you for reading, sharing and affirming!
Thank you Marie. My own experiences have made me more open minded, compassionate and considerate. I would rather not have had the pain but it made me a better person in the end. I would still rather no other child went through it.
I agree Darren, the experience can have a positive outcome making you more aware and resilient but just as easily it can ruin a life. Can you offer one takeaway word of advice for parents or for victims?
I need to think about it more but I will say this.
People are often bullied because they are different and/or stand out in some way. This individuality is something to be embraced and nobody should ever feel they must pretend to conform in order to be accepted. Being someone you are not is setting yourself up for more misery down the line. Parents should encourage their children to be their own person and bullying should neither be ignored nor tolerated.
I spent years suppressing who I was for fear of being bullied or ridiculed even as an adult long after school ended. I was 40 before I came to terms with who I am. A lot of wasted years.
Thank you so much Darren for considering my query and responding with a key points and valuable insight. I couldn’t agree more! 1.Bullies are envious of individuality. 2.Parents need to support children in developing resilience and self-esteem. 3. Zero tolerance. 4. Proactive approach. Thank you!!
I’m so sorry this happened to you and your family. I’ve started and stopped in writing my thoughts on bullying. It’s a terrible problem that can effect a young persons life significantly. I’ll write more later. Take care, Marie!
Thank you Brenda for reading and sharing your thoughts! Same situation here, starting to write, many versions written and then stopping again! It is difficult to open up and admit the impact of bullying. I guess being/feeling powerless takes time to overcome and feeling voiceless is part of it. It has been difficult but it has also sculpted us into who we now are and when you can see a maturity ahead of its years in a 19 and 22 year old then it has been worth it! I will take care & thank you Brenda!
Know that you are not alone and that we can turn our lives around! Your warm hug over the ocean is the nicest gift I’ve received today! Thank you Orchid daughter for reading and sharing how it made you feel. Xx
Gosh, that’s so lovely to hear Parakhit, thank you! It took us a long time to fully understand the issue that drove the change in personality and behaviour we were seeing but I am grateful that we could finally understand and be there as best we could, even if we couldn’t solve it. Xx
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February 14, 2018 at 9:05 pm
My own experiences as a child have left a great deal of damage and is consequently a topic close to my heart. It must be tackled. Thank you for this post Marie. Dx
LikeLiked by 2 people
February 14, 2018 at 9:40 pm
Darren, I’m sorry you had to go through difficult experiences but I’m glad it helps you understand what I shared. I hope to open up convetsations about it and maybe show others that something negative can become something positive and life changing! Thank you for reading, sharing and affirming!
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February 14, 2018 at 10:03 pm
Thank you Marie. My own experiences have made me more open minded, compassionate and considerate. I would rather not have had the pain but it made me a better person in the end. I would still rather no other child went through it.
LikeLiked by 1 person
February 14, 2018 at 10:15 pm
I agree Darren, the experience can have a positive outcome making you more aware and resilient but just as easily it can ruin a life. Can you offer one takeaway word of advice for parents or for victims?
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February 14, 2018 at 10:42 pm
I need to think about it more but I will say this.
People are often bullied because they are different and/or stand out in some way. This individuality is something to be embraced and nobody should ever feel they must pretend to conform in order to be accepted. Being someone you are not is setting yourself up for more misery down the line. Parents should encourage their children to be their own person and bullying should neither be ignored nor tolerated.
I spent years suppressing who I was for fear of being bullied or ridiculed even as an adult long after school ended. I was 40 before I came to terms with who I am. A lot of wasted years.
LikeLiked by 2 people
February 14, 2018 at 10:59 pm
Thank you so much Darren for considering my query and responding with a key points and valuable insight. I couldn’t agree more! 1.Bullies are envious of individuality. 2.Parents need to support children in developing resilience and self-esteem. 3. Zero tolerance. 4. Proactive approach. Thank you!!
LikeLiked by 1 person
February 15, 2018 at 3:19 am
I’m so sorry this happened to you and your family. I’ve started and stopped in writing my thoughts on bullying. It’s a terrible problem that can effect a young persons life significantly. I’ll write more later. Take care, Marie!
LikeLiked by 1 person
February 15, 2018 at 6:01 am
Thank you Brenda for reading and sharing your thoughts! Same situation here, starting to write, many versions written and then stopping again! It is difficult to open up and admit the impact of bullying. I guess being/feeling powerless takes time to overcome and feeling voiceless is part of it. It has been difficult but it has also sculpted us into who we now are and when you can see a maturity ahead of its years in a 19 and 22 year old then it has been worth it! I will take care & thank you Brenda!
LikeLiked by 1 person
March 11, 2019 at 5:10 pm
❤️A post that touches me and I can feel it far into my soul❤️
I send you a warm hug over the ocean🦋
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March 11, 2019 at 7:39 pm
Know that you are not alone and that we can turn our lives around! Your warm hug over the ocean is the nicest gift I’ve received today! Thank you Orchid daughter for reading and sharing how it made you feel. Xx
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March 11, 2019 at 7:48 pm
Thank you for your kind words, you are so beatiful🦋I love the way you write.
❤️
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March 11, 2019 at 8:03 pm
Thank you that’s lovely to know and I appreciate your feedback. Marie Xx
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March 12, 2019 at 11:13 am
❤️my pleasure🦋
I hope you have a nice day🦋
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March 12, 2019 at 8:05 am
Very smart to write the indicators for parents to be aware of/ looking for!
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March 12, 2019 at 8:49 am
Thank you Kate, sometimes as parents we are too busy to see the signs and we can inadvertently put it down to puberty and moods.
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March 12, 2019 at 8:51 am
so true, well done Marie 🙂
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March 12, 2019 at 3:16 pm
Thanks Kate! Xx
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March 12, 2019 at 8:46 pm
welcome
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March 21, 2019 at 2:22 pm
Marie I truly admire you for understanding, for knowing exactly, for having the right words. Most parents think their children are exaggerating
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March 21, 2019 at 10:34 pm
Gosh, that’s so lovely to hear Parakhit, thank you! It took us a long time to fully understand the issue that drove the change in personality and behaviour we were seeing but I am grateful that we could finally understand and be there as best we could, even if we couldn’t solve it. Xx
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