Twelve Days of Christmas…Nine…Measure.

Update/Breakthrough…Thanks to a comment below this post I have to add a P.S….below my original post…

“Measure yourself against what you can achieve, against your own goals, not what you perceive others to be achieving.”

Vince Jeevar PsychSpot
The Pursuit Of Unhappiness. Pt III

What a great piece of advice! Start today…compete against yourself, set your own goals, raise your own bar, push your own development and avoid comparing yourself to others.

After all it’s like comparing an Irish summer to a Spanish summer…two totally different animals!

484ae1884a6af4676a4beb5fde1978ac--be-better-better-life

What has been your experience of setting and achieving your own goals? Have you seen what happens when you stop comparing yourself to others? I would love to hear your thoughts!

Much love,

Marie.

Update/Breakthrough

If you are reading for the first time…thank you for visiting. If you are visiting because of my update then thank you for your time, for visiting and reading again…

The subject of bullying and abuse is a subject that’s very close to my heart. Both my children were bullied…we still struggle with the aftermath…

Crazywriterof6’s comment (‘ I try ‘)…below has provided the key to help me unlock what I have wanted to share but couldn’t verbalise…until now.

My response…to Crazywriterof6…was as follows…

“Lovely to see you here, thanks for visiting and commenting! The main thing is that we continue to ‘try’.
I have learned a lot from my children. When my children were bullied I saw that our sense of power is taken from us – we feet (should read feel) useless/powerless or in otherwords demotivated/disempowered. (We give up ‘trying’ because we have been told through the actions of abusers that we are not good enough; ie we are told we are too stupid, too slow, too skinny, too fat, too smelly, gay etc….)

But if we can take on board the idea that what we ‘try’ to do today is ‘good enough’ for today and if we remain motivated to ‘try’ again tomorrow (no matter how bad we think ‘we’ or our effort was)…then we are on the path to accepting ourself as ‘good enough’…that’s all we need to be…we don’t need to be perfect!

And when we learn to be happy with not being perfect (not comparing ourselves to others) then it’s an awesome realisation and feeling of being ‘good enough as I am! A realisation that I don’t need to be like anybody else – I am myself”
Keep writing, keep ‘trying’ !! Best wishes, Marie. Thanks for helping me put this into words for the first time (feeling emotional now!) Bless you!

The work of ‘Alfred Adler…Individual Psychology’ has been a positive in this journey for me and informed my learning…you may find it interesting also.

Please share your thoughts with me!

Much love,

Marie

Create Space

Hi... failte (Irish for welcome! and pronounced fall-thhha). I'm a newbie to blogging, here just over a year, but what a great year it has been! I've turned the corner to 50 recently and two things become more relevant...time and experiences! Material possessions are less important! Using time wisely and truly experiencing each day holds a new significance for me! If you wish..., a little of the back story... I''m blessed to be married to a kind and loving man for 28 years, we have two children now 19 and 21. As I approached 40 and searching for something more, whilst holding down my then part-time legal secretarial work, I trained as a voluntary adult literacy tutor, with the hope of helping adults improve their literacy skills and have a second, and better experience of learning! However, little did I think that wanting to help others improve their lives would see my own life improve beyond measure also! You see for years I found it difficult to know what to do as I watched our two children suffer at the hands of bullies. Their struggle began to change when I returned to education! Through education I slowly gained valuable knowledge, I grew in confidence and self-esteme and it had a ripple effect! By 2014, aged 47 I had completed a Higher Certificate in Literacy Development and a B.A. in Adult Education. I love my work as an adult educator, particularly when adults trust me enough to let down their defences and 'let me in'. Then I can help them by getting to know what makes them 'tic' and what 'lights their fire!'. As an added bonus along the way I've realised that I also have a love of writing and that writing is cathartic (providing psychological relief through written expression of built up emotions), both for my students and myself. This blog enables me to pursue that new-found interest and I've really enjoying reading your blogs, sharing comments, getting to know so many people and gaining new perspectives. I also like to share any little 'gems' of learning I've gathered along the way! Thanks for sharing your stories and for helping me realise that it is all possible...and that together we write a truly better story! Much love, Marie x

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December 22, 2017

Capability, Challenges, Courage, Growth

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