20160402_172509.jpgYOU’D NEVER THINK… that the thundering sound of water hitting the bottom of the toilet bowl and the toilet seat rattling as it’s laid to rest again and the tap running, pouring refreshing morning cool water onto a pair of 18 year old hands at 8.40 on a school morning could be such a welcome and much hoped for sound… but it is…
And you might ask why, why…the thundering sound of water hitting the bottom of the toilet bowl and the toilet seat rattling as it’s laid to rest again and the tap running, pouring refreshing morning cool water onto a pair of 18 year old hands at 8.40 on a school morning could be such a welcome and much hoped for sound?
Well…simply because for years now we have struggled to accepted, amidst burning tears of upset and soul searching questioning, why him? why us? and of course the selfish, why me? Why we couldn’t be normal, be average, be functioning, why we couldn’t hear the much taken for granted, thundering sound of water hitting the bottom of the toilet bowl and the toilet seat rattling as it’s laid to rest again and the tap running, pouring refreshing morning cool water onto a pair of 18 year old hands at 8.40 on a school morning?
But painfully and over time, learning, all the time learning, to accept that things were why they were for a reason, albeit a reason that was infuratingly difficult to define, diagnose, label, solve or expect others to understand or empathise with! “I’d prefer to have cancer” he said in the depts of frustration.
Yet we strove to accept, to love without any preconceptions, without predefined expectations and boy was that a journey, a journey with many stops and starts, baby steps of progress, with hopes of light at the end of the tunnel only to slip backwards into upset, sleep, isolation and backwards broken bodyclock…
But long after acceptance takes a fragile hold, and preconceptual love, begins to share freely its love and those personal, subjective, selfish expectations no longer expect; then like a waterfall after a night’s tumultuous and unceasing rain do we unexpectedly hear… the thundering sound of water hitting the bottom of the toilet bowl and the toilet seat rattling as it’s laid to rest again and the tap running, pouring refreshing morning cool water onto a pair of 18 year old hands at 8.40 on a school morning and we joyfully realise that the spirit is again trying, embracing, seeking out its potential even if only for today and we are thankful, filled with a sense of gratitude and unconditional love, yes him, yes us, yes selfish old me! And he hears a joke on the radio, and he laughs heartily and we laugh heartily and he faces the day….